How does one want death but not actually want it?
How does one crave something so violent but can’t go through with it?
Something so feared yet worshiped.
Something that lingers, following you in constant.

If you want it, it leaves, but when you feel free it comes creeping back in unwanted
Does that warrant concern? Does that make you a bad person?
To not want the unwanted now, but only when convenient to you?

Death doesn’t bargain, no, death doesn’t pull favors.
It will take and take until it’s satisfied. But when is something ever satisfied when it could have more.

If only the night could hear
As it is my only solace to all I bare
No sound, No words spoken
But the night knows even if it doesn’t show it

I sit alone hoping for it to swallow me
To hide me in it’s cold embrace from eyes who see
And yet, here I wait for the night, even though it’s already here
The night doesn’t wait, nor does it feel

The winds will say hello even when the wind doesn’t blow
You just need to listen, to know
Without the winds, no breath blows
You stay suffocating in the unknown
Until the wind blows

Will you say hello back?
Will you take what the wind gives?
Life? The air to breathe again?
What if you say no?
Will you dwindle in the stale air?
Suffocate on what you didn’t take?
What you didn’t know?
Why?

Because you were afraid the wind would stay?
But now it’s too late
As the wind already passed to blow in another place