helpless romantic
i am.
always anticipating my forever
infatuation
best described as
my sweaty palms
nail biting
fluttered heartbeat
excessive smiles

desire.

I am staring
At the same sky
I was staring at last year,
Listening to the same birds
I was listening to last year
Waiting for the same sunset
As I wait for this year

But the difference is
Everything seemed so empty
Last year
Because I didn't know you

I am lost:
My mind scattered
In endless constellations above me.

As dreams infuse with reality
And thoughts diffuse into insanity
I realize:
To be insane is to see the infinite.

Guilt is a grey and desolate shore,
Abandoned many years before,
And you’re sitting on the sand alone,
While the wind calls out with a dreary moan.

The warm sand below, your body does charm;
Holds you like an infant in a mother's arms.
Although the comfort is all but a lie,
You lay your head down and slowly close an eye.

Through the stormy high-tides you sleep;
And slowly but surely the waves begin to creep.
You do not feel the icy water lick your toes,
Nor when it devours you in your ignorant doze.

Until one day you no longer roam the misty beach;
The waves have grasped you in their callous reach.
Swallowing you whole, beyond horizons ahead;
In a sea of apologies that were left unsaid.

It is very rare
To live in the moment.

At any given time
We find ourselves
Thinking about the past
Or planning for the future.

To live in the moment
Is the most beautiful
Feeling;
Because you remember
Every sound,
Smell and touch,
And have memorised
Every crease on your lover's palm.

And for days,
Months
And even years,
You will live in that moment

Until time drains the colour
Of that memory,
Like a used cloth,
And you have to find
Another moment to live in.