Who do I plan on calling
When the thunder is brawling
When the lightning is hauling
And my tears won't stop falling?

Who do I plan on telling
When I just can't stop laughing
When the story is worth clearing
And it's something you'd love hearing?

Who do I plan on discussing
When all my blood is rushing
When my face is red and blushing
And youve left me warm and flushing?

Who do I plan on longing
When I lack all belonging
When I want to feel that bonding
And your face is just too haunting?

Who do I plan on sharing
When the songs deserve comparing
When my love is feeling daring
And your laugh is brightly flaring?

Who do I plan on thinking about
If you're all I think about?

Please break my heart
So I don't have to break yours
I'd rather feel all that pain
Than be the one to make you endure

Please break my heart
So I can leave yours intact
I'd rather be haunted
Than have to hear you react

Please break my heart
So I can live with my decision
I'd rather lose all my tears
Than have tears disrupt your vision

Please break my heart
So I'm not the one serving time
Id rather feel completely caged
Than be the one to commit this crime

Please break my heart
So I can make sure you're OK
I'd rather lose my voice
Than listen to all you might say

This request might seem odd
I ask for you to do the downing
But if we're both stuck in this storm together
I'd rather be the one drowning

So much sadness I am feeling
Yet it can't seem to fall
I start feeling little
And then nothing at all

My heart is afraid
Of an inconsolable strain
And he knows that's what I need
But he can only know the pain

The tears can't find a path
To stream down my face
A throb behind my eyes
That can never escape

I twist and I turn
I claw at my head
I'm stuck in a cage
While I lie down in bed

I guess I'm to blame
I resisted for so long
I thought I was brave
I'm thinking that I'm wrong

So now I don't await my collapse
I don't await that burst
Because my heart he has decided
To block out all that hurt

I feel like taking you somewhere
Far away from my home
Somewhere I can breath
Where we can be alone

I'll open up my heart
And let you look inside
Fully open to your gaze
And all that I hide

You'll laugh and i'll melt
The way I tend to be
When you're talking out loud
When you're talking of me

There might be a breeze
Or some sun in your hair
You'll apologize for something
And ill say i don't care

Because how could I care
When I'm sitting here with you
When there's so much to touch
So much we could do

I hope the wind will sting my eyes
So you'll wipe away my tears
I hope you'll open your heart too
So I can pick away your fears

I feel like taking you somewhere
Where we can be alone
Somewhere I can breath
A place that feels like home

I hold onto words
As if they're the air I breath
And I decipher each one
So that I'll know what they mean

Their voices are like proof
That I can do more than just admire
Their texts are like evidence
That I can be ones desire

I tell myself I'm something
Though I believe it's dishonest
If the walls could talk my full length mirror
Could love me with true promise

I measure my worth
Through numbers and facts
My feelings they grow dusty
My tears shoved under mats

I let people with no faces
Sing my praises loud
Since I'm not sure who I'll be
Or who I am right now

The more pain I feel
The greater I've achieved
The sting means it's working
A sign that I'll succeed

I tell her I'm fine
I tell him I'm great
I keep preaching love
While I reek of hate

I bought the best of materials
For this teary wet wall
The thickest facade
That I will never let fall

I decide weeks in advance
The emotions I will feel
It's hard to be sick
But it's harder to heal

I feel comfort in my decision
To lie to all around me
So I may continue to rot
So no one will stop me

I know all the steps
The steps one takes to remedy
But the plague in my blood
Has made me lose my memory

For now I'll be alive
Though I might not be living
And I'll cling onto my blight
And all that it is giving

The things I've been told
Never really clicked with my heart
Ive never given up mobility
Or mental health stability
I just let them crumble to parts