I'm less upset about the fact that you lied to me,
And more upset about the fact that you wasted my time,
My time,
The most expensive thing I own,
You're a smart thief,
Taking the thing I value the most,
The thing I have the least of,

What did you think it would work on me,
Me whose been lied to and cheated so many times that I can tell a lie from a truth in an instant,
The only thing that hurts is that I didn't find out sooner,

And when I called you out on it,
You tried to lie again,
What good was it?
Didn't you know we were done for,

You don't think I found out what you wanted after that first lie,
The lie that ended it all,
The lie that showed just how rotten your soul was,

The lie that made me end it all,
That's right,
I ended it,
Not you,
Because what is gold compared to street trash,
No wonder why no one wanted to talk to you,

Now I wonder was your illness also a lie,
A deceit,
A way to trick someone,

To hell with you,
Let me leave with this,
I am a Phoenix,
I am reborn from my own ashes,
That is the power I hold,
To give the gift of life at will,
To heal,
To become a flame so powerful that it has the power to heal but also the power to destroy,
That is what I am,

The time spent with you was a mistake,
And one I have dearly learnt from

Where does your sadness come from
he said
I’m not sure
either from yesterday or
next door
Must be next door
he said
no one lives in yesterday
anymore

i still wish you never showed me that song
because something so beautiful
shouldn't hurt me so much

step one.)
think. think of everything that people must hate about you.

step two.)
let it consume you until you forget to breathe

step three.)
drop microscopic hints to people that you're not okay

step four.)
breakdown when they don't get it

step five.)
make excuses for them

step six.)
fear that they do get it, but you just bother them so much that they don't care

step seven.)
stop talking

step eight.)
start overeating, or eating nothing (with practice, you may be able to do a combination of both)

step nine.)
watch tv until you fall asleep on the couch every night

step ten.)
don't shower

step eleven.)
go numb

step twelve.)
receive a notification on your phone that sends you spiraling into self loathing and wondering why the hell you did this in the first place because it doesn't make it better. it doesn't. it doesn't

step thirteen.)
feel selfish for even thinking about bothering anyone again just to satisfy your own stupid craving for attention

step fourteen.)
finally reach out

step fifteen.)
repeat steps one through fourteen. again and again and again.

step sixteen.)
die