I don't think that I could taste another's lips
without comparing them to yours
Inhale their breath into my lungs
Breathe their scent in through my pores

I don't think that I could touch their skin
Or run my fingers through their hair
Can't get lost within their gaze
With your presence always there

And I can still hear your voice
Fingers still feel your skin within their tips
You dared say you loved me
with his spit smeared on your lips

How could you say I was the only one
After everything you've done
I'm surprised the words rolled out
while his taste held down your tongue

If only she knew
That I sit alone at night
Drinking by myself
Thinking about her
Wishing she was mine

If only she knew
That I'll never be alright
Going through this hell
Till my eyes begin to blur
And I only see her in my mind

If only she knew

That the hardest part of my day
Is when I think about her lips
Sliding through his skin
As he moves in for the kiss
Think about his hand
starting to caress her cheeks
They both gasp for air
though no one speaks
And her eyes can't seem to look away from his

If only she knew

That that's the hardest part
Knowing that she's his
Knowing that her gorgeous lips
are only his to kiss
And that her beautiful eyes
Are looking right through me
Knowing that I'm nothing to her
And that I'll never be

If only she knew

That she leaves me Paralyzed
When she looks me with her eyes
It feels so cold
Yet I feel so alive
If only she would realize
That without her my heart cries
It's hard to beat, though it still tries
If only she knew
The pain of getting lost within her eyes

Heart, please tell me why.
I'm still waiting..by my phone
Waiting for a message that'll never come
Sitting here alone
Just watching the time run

Do you remember how we used to be?
I wonder If like me, she's feeling lonely
This depression doesn't want to set me free
Heart, I'm begging you to cure me

Because time doesn't seem to numb the pain
The heartache when I hear her name
These tears don't seem to stop the flame
I'm begging you to set me free

Oh heart, you turned out to be a traitor
Let her go so we can save her
Knowing we'd regret it later
But her happiness was not with me

The past is where my mind now dwells
As I suffer here all by myself
Knowing her kiss now belongs to someone else
And now she'll never smile for me

Oh heart, please let her go
She won’t come back, we both know
And no matter how much we wish it wasn't so
Only she can set me free

I had a relapse
Last night I stayed awake
Staring at the ceiling
Seconds felt like hours
Half consciousness
was messing with my feelings
As hours did pass, all I saw
Were the shadows mimicking your features
A war broke out inside my heart
I was fighting my own creatures
I had a relapse
Just when I gathered enough strength
To stop thinking about you
Thinking of your eyes, so cold...so blue
Imagining your voice screeching out my name
Pulling at my hair knowing it's all inside my brain
I had a relapse
When I finally resolved myself to hate you so
To hate your eyes and hate your voice
The hours bled out and And all I felt
Was your absence made a hole inside my soul
And how I feared that I'd never once again
be fully whole.
I had a relapse.
I love you, and I always will
I love your eyes, your smile and voice
Your laugh still gives me chills
And I'm afraid that I cant run away
No matter where..I'll hear your name
And tomorrow I'll relapse again
And while I stay awake
Nothing will take away the ache
I'll spend every second wondering
if you knew
That I'd spend every night
For the Rest of my life
Still thinking about you

Take this knife away from me
Because Cutting doesn't help me anymore
Take my pills and ***** as well
That I keep stored up in my drawer
I've tried living in a daze
But my wounds are feeling sore
My head is spinning round and round
I'm still as lost as I was before
My life is going nowhere fast
And I just can't take it anymore
I wish that I could rest in peace
But all I know is war

I am broken, I am scared
Surrounded by people and still alone
My heart is calloused, barely beating
Chills run deep within my bones
I'e been angry and gone screaming
But no one seems to hear me moan
I am crying, slowly dying
Everyone's been fooled by a smile
I have shown

It should come to no surprise
That I'm feeling lost again
I stay awake all night
Trying to drink away my pain
I'm trying to drown all of the voices
From the demons in my brain
But nothing's quite as haunting
As you  whispering my name
I will fail...I know....that I'll feel pain again
If you came back into my life
It's only to make me suffer till the end

Why do I let you keep doing this to me
You're still a ghost haunting, never sets me free
Whenever you appear you only come to hurt
Drop me to one knee just to drag me through the dirt
Why do I let you make me hate myself
I'm begging you..don't let this heart become my hell
Why do I let you come just to do your harm
Might as well grab this knife and start slashing at my arm
Why the hell am I addicted to this pain
Why  do butterflies still fly with the sound of just your name
Tell me why I'll forever be in love
Tell me...god... why that'll never be Enough

It should come to no surprise
That I'm feeling lost again
I stay awake all night
Trying to drink away my pain
I'm trying to drown your voice
That dances circles in my brain
Keep trying to bite my tongue
To keep from shouting out your name
I will fail...I know that I'm all yours again
All my bones are aching
Wrapped around your finger till the end
And there's no point in hoping
I know you see this as a game
But even if you don't love me
Please continue to Pretend