built you up
out of nowhere
now you are everywhere
flowers you gave me
are dry now
as our love
it has gone away

I never ate my emotions
I starved them
That's also an
Emotional Disorder

3-8-25   11:59pm

she opens the door
and invites him in
she leaves it open
for him to decide

stay
or
leave

which will he choose?

but it doesn't matter
because she has herself
her beauty
her grace
her humor
her integrity
and most importantly
a huge
beating heart
filled with love

You think I’m ok
That is what you see
It’s not as simple as you think
There are things you don't see
It’s all in my head
Mentally I’m not ok
It doesn’t always stay that way
There are demons up there
I’m not good enough they say
They tell me I’m not gonna make it
They are easy to believe
It’s hard to understand
It’s hard to comprehend
It’s not a simple fix
Not a one handed trick
It’s a continuous process
A journey worth while
I can get better
I will get better
I’m determined to get there
I’ll be able to change
I can’t do it without others
I wouldn’t be the same
One day I will see the change in me
One day I’ll find the person I want to be

all that pain
and belittlement
you served me
day and night
when no one
was looking
made the little
man within you
feel much, much,
much bigger
but now you
stand before me
weeping
with no teeth
and the big man
within me
has forgiven you.

If you return,
do not knock,
the door has memorized your hands.

If you leave,
do not turn back,
the wind carries only forward.

Like two lips,
pursed together,
but in a smile.

The petals are smooth -
coloured in silky shades
of red or pink
or perhaps a
vibrant cerise.

He buys me these flowers
every anniversary
to remind me

of his deep
and enduring love.