I fear that I shall die without ever being truly known.
As the autumn nears I pull more into myself
Carrying my bleeding beating heart in my open palm blood dripping between my fingers and down my wrist
Droplets disappearing into the earth
Desperately holding myself in
Feeling my fingernails claw at my insides
My soul begging to be let out
To be free.
This is the harvest of what I have sown
This is the ultimate Autumn
The forever alone

When she first met him,
He was so slim;
A gentleman,
To begin.
When she first met him.

When he first met her,
She was so demure;
She'd defer,
Often concur.
When he first met her.

She'd smile on him.
He'd open doors.
She cooked and worked.
He worked and cooked.

Good morning, my Dear.
Good night, my Love.
I got groceries.
Did you get milk?
I called your Mother.
Is your Father okay?
Teacher interviews at five.
I'll drive.
Did you get to the bank?
I made an appointment.
What's the address?
Your sister's on her way.

This was their dialogue
On that day.

She's kind.
He's a find.
He's hers.
She's his.

Ever the twain shall meet.

Don't you get it?
Maybe if seeing wasn't always believing
Just maybe for once it wasn't just that
You would understand ALL of me
ALL of the unseeable conditions
ALL of the unseeable injuries I have acquired through life
Just if you can read deeper into me you could believe

like the moon
I go through

phases

some of my
lights go out

and I become
dull and distant

give me time
they will come

back on

like the moon
I do not ask

for praise or
forgiveness

it is just a
phase

I am going through

Dear me,
Don't just sit
Rise, and pursue greatness.

Don't just watch
Go after what you want.

Don't just exist
Strive and start living.

Don't just dream
Work hard and aim for success.

Don't get tired
Keep hiking until you get to the peak.